September 2011
because it’s so beautiful
but it’s too expensive
so I’m sad.
and I’m still dreaming about you.
Nightmares dream
And the dead men all wear shoes
It was bound to happen.
Before I fall asleep
You tell me stories that come from the top of your head
Or you nuzzle your hair in my face
I think,
From now on I am taken care of
And everything about the space in between us
Is nothing but warmth
“You make Chuck Norris know how to love.”
I don’t remember when I started feeling better. Or when I stopped blaming my loneliness on your absence. Or when my mind was somehow unchained from tiny pinpricks to the brain that caused me jerk a little to the left or right. But I use to be fearless with your ghost next to me. And now I’m afraid of everything.
I fear the letters in my mailbox and coffee with an old friend.
And I am so deathly afraid of driving slow.
I’ll fall asleep.